Thursday, August 20, 2009

A Bad, Bad Joke

But my mom (MIC= mother of the IC!) sent it to me. What am I going to do, not post it? Thanks, Mom.


How well do you know YOUR (mostly Protestant) hymns?

Dentist's Hymn................................Crown Him with Many Crowns

Weatherman's Hymn.......................There Shall Be Showers of Blessings

Contractor's Hymn.........................The Church's One Foundation

The Tailor's Hymn...........................Holy, Holy, Holy

The Golfer's Hymn..........................There's a Green Hill Far Away

The Politician's Hymn.....................Standing on the Promises

Optometrist's Hymn........................Open My Eyes That I Might See

The IRS Agent's Hymn.....................I Surrender All

The Gossip's Hymn............................Pass It On

The Electrician's Hymn...................Send The Light

The Shopper's Hymn........................Sweet Bye and Bye

The Realtor's Hymn...............I've Got a Mansion Just over the Hilltop

The Massage Therapists Hymn.......He Touched Me

The Doctor's Hymn...............................The Great Physician

AND for those who speed on the highway - a few hymns:

45mph....................God Will Take Care of You

65mph...................... Nearer My God To Thee

85mph...................This World Is Not My Home

95mph.......................Lord, I'm Coming Home

100mph..................Precious Memories

8 the midrash:

ArchAngel's Advocate said...

Ya forgot the Pilot's Hymn....I'll Fly Away

Ray from MN said...

Or the Baker's Hymn: Panis Angelicus (Bread of Angels)

Roz said...

I immediately sent this to my (mostly Protestant) children. Thanks, MIC.

Roz said...

I just thought of another one:

Emergency Med Tech's Hymn: Breath on Me, Breath of God

CMinor said...

A local hair salon used to display Hymns for the Over-50 Set on its marquis. My favorite:

It Is Well With My Soul (But My Knees Sure Hurt)

Panda Rosa said...

This isn't a pun, but whenever I find the hymn "Am I a Soldier of the Cross?" in the hymnal, I always write "this is the hymn in 'Tom Sawyer'" over it. Check it out, it is.

The Contempative Catholic said...

The Zookeeper's Hymn: All Creatures of Our God and King.

SherryTex said...

darn...now I'm going to have some of those songs stuck in my head for the next few hours.