It Did Not Come Upon A Midnight Clear: More Horrid Nativity Sets, with commentary

Grrrrrrrrrr. 

Also, somewhere, there is a Doggie Last Supper where Judas in clearly rabid.

And then an angel appeared, pronouncing: "DO NOT. DROWN. THE SON. OF GOD."

or

Didn't Mary and Joseph get that video in the hospital, "Do not shake the baby!"?

This also substitutes as a lovely bocce set.  Oh wait, I think it is one.

or

Calling the Walker Art Museum!

The kicker is there is a wind-up music box in the back playing "Feliz Navidad."

All of them (sob) found here.

I Will Never Complain About Church Musicians Again

...so long as I can avoid encountering this:

See, it's like a holy jukebox for musician-deprived churches!

OK, first thoughts:

Can I have a pizza and beer with that?

And I'm cueing up Stairway to Heaven right now!

Sigh.  At Ship of Fools.

Luther's "Here I Stand" Socks...For Sale

1. With all apologies to my Lutheran brothers and sisters: while this catapults you into a real race with the Catholics for kitsch, we will crush you like grapes in this arena.  

2. Pink?

3. What happens if you sit down wearing these socks?  Do they self-destruct like Mission Impossible?

4. As the website says, Luther probably didn't actually say these words.  Darned humorless scholars.

HT: Ship O' Fools.  (And you have to love a website that rates the chances of rapture on a daily basis.  Today, 81%.  Although maybe that's the humidity.)

We Mourn In Our Own Ways: The Pope Beer

Alas, this appears to no longer be for sale.  But if we beg them?  One last round?

"Holy wine is so last papacy. ...

'We consider it to be our obligation to appreciate the election of a Bavarian Pope in a Bavarian way,' says brewery Weideneder Bräu, which is local to where young Joe Ratzinger grew up. 'The Pope’s Beer is a festival beer of highest quality containing only exquisite raw materials, presenting a mild character and a light colour, brewed strictly in accordance with the German beer purity law.' Well... er... amen to that."

HT Ship O Fools.

Salvation History On A Rubic's Cube

Greeaaat.  I NEVER get past the first panel.  My spiritual life is permanently twisted (apparently, literally).

OK, it's not a Rubics cube; its the most complicated picture book ever.  But I bet I still mess up Evangecube.  Yes, it is called that.  I suspect this item is a love it or hate it sort of deal.  Your call, people. I'd rather get a Gideon Bible myself. 

More on it here.

HT Ship O Fools.

Caption Contest #116

HT Saint Kitsch (who has his own amusing commentary)

Comment away!

Humorously Consubstantial

Always happy to find caffeine-laced, multi-syllabic, theogeek humor for sale.

The Apocalypse Approacheth #927: The Zombie Nativity

The apocalypse approacheth...or the Incarnation of Christ...whatever, eh?

Found here and sold (yes) here.

Truth Is Stranger #128: So much classier than having the rosary hanging from the rear view mirror

What you never realized you needed--the steering wheel rosary. For sale for just $45.

Complete with the "Forget sorrowful, I'm stuck in traffic hell mysteries".
(No...Joke!)

HT: Ship O'Fools.

Helping You Get To Heaven (Faster)

At Ship O' Fools.

(shaking head)

Truth Is Stranger #124: The "Let My People Go" Toilet Seat Cover

...It just brings the theocosmic drama of the Exodus down to earth, you know?

Officially, this rates four "bleahs" out of five.

Yeah, you can buy it, if you must. Don't come to me about the state of your immortal soul, though.

HT: Ship of Fools.

So... is there irony I saw this on facebook?

Heh heh heh.

For sale here. Thanks to Michael Reicken on FB.

Maybe the wonderworker will get me a hole in one!

Yes, this exists because Anthony of Padua, this amazing preacher and miracleworker, is also the patron saint of lost items.

I can't get over the idea of whacking a saint with a golf club.

For sale here.

Here I Stand. I Can Do No Other, Without My Scriptural Inserts!

"Inspirational Scriptural Shoe Inserts" are four words I never thought (or hoped) I would read together as a phrase.

There's more yet: it's a fundraising tool!

Finally, the company motto is "Standing on the Word of God."

For the brave, here is the website.

And a big hat tip to the equally outraged Matt of Church of No People.

"The Apps of the Apostles"

You know, our family just inherited an old tracfone and we feel like we have broken new techie ground. But for the rest of the world, there is a very funny new feature at the Anglican Ship O'Fools: the best holiest (?) apps for the IPhone.

p.s. I like the Hallelujah button.

Theology in the Tennies!

Sad, just sad. But I had five minutes and couldn't help myself from making...

liturgically correct shoes

"Perfect for Theology in the Tennies! Get one for your favorite street theologian!"

The Apocalypse Cometh, Evidence #903

The Noah's Ark collectibles phenom is bad enough, but...finger puppets about the 10 plagues on the Egyptians?

It's Enough To Make You Not Want To Be A Saint, Lest This Happen To YOU

First, parts of your body could get sent off to reliquaries. Then, if you're really an amazing saint, this could happen...

Padre Pio is the next big must-have, and here at last is a Pio gadget with moving parts. Shipmate Letitia Landers King, from Birmingham, Alabama, has plugged us into the Padre Pio electric statue (available from EWTN), which bows on command.

Handpainted and made of resin, the stooping saint originates in Italy and costs just $128.00. An electronic Pope John Paul II, kissing the airport tarmac, cannot be far behind.

Found at Ship Of Fools.

Truth Is Stranger #88: Funky Bible Proverbs

There are no words.

But much laughter at the...ingenuity...of our brother in Christ here. Listen. Please.

(A big hat tip to Bismuth. Give me your url and you'll get the link!)

(There are no words in contemplative prayer either. NaPraGoMo all!)

The Apocalypse Approacheth #913

You need more evidence?



Yes. Here.