Friday's Ironic QOTD

A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor
for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself.

-Jessamyn West

A Slideshow Chockfull of Ironic Catholic Goodness

Picture source.

Some of my favorite photos, slideshow style, from Flickr. They aren't photos taken by me, just favorite finds. A couple are serious but most are funny takes on religion.

Hate slideshows? Here's a bunch through thumbnails.

Enjoy.

Caption Contest #48

Picture source.

I know it isn't necessarily religious, but rainbows, signs of hope and promise and the covenant...you all are smart blog readers, you can do this!
--p.s. reminds me of this gem I've used before!

UPDATE! We have a winner:
Christine: Ben Franklin was right!!! (follow the link to get the joke)

Vocations Rise 30% After Denim Habit Adopted

The new habit features handy back pockets for rosaries and holy cards, right.

Moorhead, MN: In the decades-long simmering impasse between "habited nuns" and "street clothes sisters," an order has found a middle way: blue denim habits.

Sr. Anna Maria Lindstrom of The Little Sisters of the Annunciation explained, "Our order, founded in 1720, had our sisters in a traditional black habit. It was elegantly simple but definitely set us apart from the crowd: and that had advantages and disadvantages to our ministry to the working class immigrants to whom we were entrusted. Then Vatican II asked us to consider the roots of our order's charism, and we discerned that our habit had moved from being simple, typical 18th century garb to relatively elaborate 20th century clothing. So we moved to simple laity clothing, and left the veil. It seemed innocent enough."

But then vocations plummeted: because of changes in the culture, the Church, the order, or the Motherhouse cafeteria, Sister Anna Maria is not sure. Some sisters kept the habit. Others kicked it. Everyone began talking more about habits than devotion to God and others. The need was clear: a compromise.

Sr. Jeanne Brown debuted the blue jean habit, with simple denim veil, this March 25 (the feast of the Annunciation).

"We thought when Mary encountered the Holy Spirit, let's be honest: she likely was wearing the equivalent of blue jeans, or work clothes. And blue is a color associated with the Blessed Mother. And so many of our "no habit" sisters were wearing denim jumpers anyway...this wasn't a far stretch," Sr. Jeanne noted.

"I love it," announced Sr. Felicity App. "It's so comfortable and holy at the same time. This wasn't quite the mortification I expected, but I love it all the same."

Sr. Anna Maria pointed out that efforts to maintain some individual flair remained: the sisters could choose dark indigo or acid wash denim habits.

However, the real shock came with the vocations promotion video this Spring, titled "Finally, Jeans That Fit." The video, set to Neil Diamond's Forever in Blue Jeans for organ, picturing grinning blue jean habit clad nuns of every age, and closes with "When we're on our knees--praying to God or tending to God's poor--our good habits hold up." Inquiries went up 50%, and confirmed aspirants are up 30%.

"Praise God and Levi Strauss," said Sr. Anna Maria. "As they advertise, quality never goes out of style. The sisterhood is like that."

--I.C.

Prayers

I'm not a huge fan of contemporary Christian music, but Stephen Curtis Chapman always seemed "real." Even if he were scum, my heart would break for his family reading this: two days ago his 5 year old daughter was killed in their driveway after accidentally being struck by a car driven by her teenage brother.

Prayers....

Blogging Vacation

I really am tired, folks. After a very rough semester, I'm still not caught up on work! Plus I'm doing some extra (serious) writing, and completing assignments in this spiritual direction preparation program (yes, I am training and discerning that)...it all boils down to needing to close my eyes, breathe, and take a blog break, at least until after my birthday. (You get to not blog on your birthday...right?) I hope to be back May 27.

May 26 is my birthday, and more importantly, the feast day of St. Philip Neri, left. Apparently he was quite the hilarious practical joker, and a good one to inspire me on this mini-sabbatical. But doesn't he look like he is about to get beat up by a baby angel? I mean, that cherubim has some serious attitude going on.).

The current caption contest is still going strong....


***************
p.s. On an entirely different note. I need to do a one week directed retreat (preferably Ignatian exercise-based) as part of this program by the end of July next year. If anyone has suggestions, I am receiving them with gratitude. This has been a lot harder to arrange than I would have guessed. I'd prefer someplace which doesn't consider drum-making an inherently spiritual act. Thanks!

Truth Is Stranger #78: Pilots lose fuel, pray, land next to "Jesus" sign

Cool.

(AP) WELLINGTON, New Zealand - It seemed like an almost literal answer to their prayers. When two New Zealand pilots ran out of fuel in a microlight airplane they offered prayers and were able to make an emergency landing in a field — coming to rest right next to a sign reading, "Jesus is Lord."

Grant Stubbs and Owen Wilson, both from the town of Blenheim on the country's South Island, were flying up the sloping valley of Pelorus Sound when the engine spluttered, coughed and died.

"My friend and I are both Christians so our immediate reaction in a life-threatening situation was to ask for God's help," Stubbs told The Associated Press on Wednesday.

He said he prayed during the ill-fated flight Sunday that the tiny craft would get over the top of a ridge and that they would find a landing site that was not too steep — or in the nearby sea.

Wilson said that the pair would have been in deep trouble if the fuel had run out five minutes earlier.

"If it had to run out, that was the place to be," he said. "There was an instantaneous answer to prayer as we crossed the ridge and there was an airfield — I didn't know it existed till then."

After Wilson glided the powerless craft to a landing on the grassy strip, the pair noticed they were beside a 20-foot-tall sign that read, "Jesus is Lord — The Bible."

"When we saw that, we started laughing," Stubbs said.

Nearby residents provided them with gas to fly the home-built plane back to base.

Justification by Drooling, Sanctification by Spell-Check

See more really "high quality" signs at the always amazing Crummy Church Signs. Joel's title for this one:

Spit is finished.

Post-Easter Season Deep Thoughts: I'm Freakin' Tired

An occasional series, in the spirit of Jack Handey's "Deep Thoughts".

(From a choir director).

"Come unto me, you who are weary," say you my Lord, but I passed "weary" two weeks ago. I am now just freakin', crazy tired. I think it has something to do with going to Mass for weeks with all this stuff going on: those fancy Triduum liturgies, and first communions, and confirmations, and every kid Jack and his sister getting baptized after the Lent backlog, then Pentecost. So I praise and thank you, Almighty God, that we can relax now. That's pretty much exactly how the original apostles responded after the Pentecost. In honor of our forebearers in Christ, let us all take a long nap. Amen.

Photo source.

Laughter and the Saints (Fr. James Martin)

Well--OK, this is a few months late, but every Catholic humor blog needs this 27 minute (funny!) lecture on why humor is appropriate in the seriously Christian life. Enjoy!

Part 1


Part 2


Part 3

Caption Contest #49

Picture source.

UPDATE! We have a winner!

Schutz (sorry, can't do the umlaut): "And for those of you in the habit of arriving just before the Gospel, I want to remind you that Sr Assumpta is on watch outside keeping a list of everyone running late for mass..."

They will beat their swords into plowshares. Or big shiny electric crosses.

I know he was going for humor...but I think I hate this with a white hot passion.

But I like LarryD's comment: " 'If you wish to be my disciple, deny yourself, pick up your light sabre, and follow me.' Kinda."

HT to Acts of the Apostasy.

More Christian Humor Links

I'm running into lots of new Catholic and/or Christian humor sites. Take a look:

• B-Movie Catechism "One man's desperate attempt to reconcile his love of his Catholic faith with his passion for really, really bad movies."
• The Brothers and Sisters of Perpetual Discernment A parody site on discerning Catholic religious vocations. Definitely soap-operatic: instead of "The Young and the Restless," think "The Young and Religious".
• Nuns Having Fun Richard Glen Michael Davis, one of the authors of Growing Up Catholic, is behind this one.
• Stuff Christians Like Very clever pokes at Christian (esp. Evangelical, it seems to me) culture.

Enjoy!--I.C.

Friday's QOTD

It seems to me that the meaning of man's life
consists in proving to himself
every minute
that he's a man
and not a piano key.

--Fyodor Doestoyesky
(found here)

Stuff Catholics Like: Sex

Whew. Did it get warm in here?

My latest post is up at Stuff Catholics Like, where I am still trying to get my land legs, writing-wise.

p.s. Don't worry, it's rated G. Sorry, Korrektiv guys.

Sacred Trash

Check out the bins.
(picture source)

Truth Is Stranger #77: Welcome Our Extraterrestrial Brothers and Sisters In Christ!

From the Vatican (yes, really):

(AP) VATICAN CITY - Believing that the universe may contain alien life does not contradict a faith in God, the Vatican's chief astronomer said in an interview published Tuesday.

The Rev. Jose Gabriel Funes, the Jesuit director of the Vatican Observatory, was quoted as saying the vastness of the universe means it is possible there could be other forms of life outside Earth, even intelligent ones.

"How can we rule out that life may have developed elsewhere?" Funes said. "Just as we consider earthly creatures as 'a brother,' and 'sister,' why should we not talk about an 'extraterrestrial brother'? It would still be part of creation."

In the interview by the Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano, Funes said that such a notion "doesn't contradict our faith" because aliens would still be God's creatures. Ruling out the existence of aliens would be like "putting limits" on God's creative freedom, he said.

OK, actually, I do agree with the director of the Observatory here. I can go Franciscan and welcome Brother Green Hairy Alien. But did he have to say "extraterrestrial brother"? Why not just wave a red flag in front of my blog and scream "POST ME! POST ME!"

And, uh, clearly he hasn't been watching the latest version of Doctor Who. If those aliens are our brothers and sisters, we have some serious Fall action going on outside of humanity.

Full story here.

HT: Ray at Stella Borealis.

College Reporter Confuses Catholic Women for Chemo Patients

Joliet, IL: A young college reporter thought he had his first break.

"I was all set to be the next Bob Woodward," University of Illinois student Matthew Swain admitted sheepishly. "Our journalism professor warned us about writing on religion--he said you can't win. This proves he's right."

Swain, a practicing Presbyterian attending Mass at St. Agatha's Parish with his girlfriend, noticed that many women in the traditional parish were wearing scarves over their heads. The next morning, he was writing a speculative piece for his blog on the high correlation between Catholic women, chemotherapy, and chemical dumps on the parish property.

The problem was, the women were wearing chapel veils.

"We're not cancer patients, at least, not most of us," argued Sarah Gostomski. "We just want to show respect for God in worship by covering our heads."

Swain thought he had covered his bases. "See, first I thought these women must be Muslim. But then I saw the crucifix, and remembered, oh yeah, my girlfriend's Catholic. Then I thought they must be nuns, but then I noticed some of them had kids, and I heard that Vatican II loosened up some things, but not that one. So obviously the next choice was that the parish was just above a chemical sinkhole causing cancer in women at an alarming rate. Any educated person would have come to the same conclusion."

When asked why he didn't inquire with his girlfriend about the head coverings, he shrunk back in horror. "Dude, I don't ask my girl about fashion. I mean, she was wearing a hat, I guess it was cute, but I didn't know what to say after that. Best just to nod and smile whenever that comes up. We just don't go there."

Fr. Anthony Bain, the pastor, was taking the unexpected parish publicity in stride: "I think the only chemical spill has been some burnt coffee. And we fixed the burner. So...come visit."

--I.C.

Immortalized?

OK, so one of my posts goes somewhat viral (at least locally) and gets made into a T-shirt by the Fair Trade Coffee and Chocolates group at my school. Said T-shirt is given to me as a gift and enthusiastically modeled by chic #3.

If you can't read it, it says:

"Spit out that slave-trade coffee, you child-labor-loving freak."

I'm so touched (sniff). Mind you, the post said that was NOT the way to open conversation. You can catch the context in Etiquette Tips for Liberal and Conservative Catholics, here.

Change You Can Believe In

Joy and Peace, everyone.

Phenomenal picture from here. HT to Happy Catholic. Poster generator here.

Caption Contest #48

Picture source here (thanks to Ken Duffy!).

UPDATE! We have winners:
Tim of Lapped Catholic:
Despite the legends and songs of individuals losing their souls to Satan in dramatic and heart wrenching ways, the devil actually acquires souls in much more mundane ways than most would think.

Allen from Allen's Brain:
"Sinner. Venial Sinner. Clergy. Saint. Convert."

"Bingo!"

Light And Leaven On A University Campus

...Part of what I have been working on, when not grading this week.

(I am in there, after the "leaven" frame, teaching away.)

I really like these students. Please wish them well--most of those pictured are going to major seminary, graduate school in theology, or off to do youth ministry in the Church. Graduation is this Saturday.

(Really in a video-watching mood?: here's last year's.)

Multiple Choice Fun

I'm still grading, cleaning, meeting with committees, recovering from research projects, and getting ready for the upcoming graduation here at RSCU (really SMALL Catholic university). Plus my computer at home is on the fritz (...insert primal scream here...). So for my post: real multiple choice questions I have asked on my first year student exams. The course is a basic introduction to reading the Bible through theology.

• The "woman clothed with the sun" in Revelation 12 is understood to symbolically represent... A. Mary B. Deborah C. Esther D. Dr. IC
• "The state of definitive self-exclusion from communion with God and the blessed" is called... A. heaven B. purgatory C. hell D. class time

More coming as time allows. Feel free to suggest your own.

Stuff Catholics Like

...a new group humor blog on the radar, just started by Ian from Aquinas and More Catholic Goods, and The Curt Jester, Paul from Alive and Young, and Maureen Martin may be involved as well. Oh yeah, and me. I don't think this is going to be "bust a gut" material (especially when I'm contributing), but it should make you chuckle and smile. The others already have for me!

The idea is having fun, gently poking at Catholic culture, mixing in a little education. Ah, my favorite combination.

My first post, on Theology, is here...I hope to get better at this.
--I.C.

Catholic College Scores Slip One Letter Grade After Warm Weekend

(A re-run, but a timely one.)

Megalopolis, Middle America: That slippery sound you just heard was everyone's cumulative grade point average at RBCU* sliding down one full letter grade.

"When I saw the forecast for 80 degrees and sunny all weekend--this last weekend before finals--I knew it was big trouble," said Professor Eugene Harrison of the Philosophy department. "All our senior theses were due on Monday, and the one person who turned it in? Seven pages. They were sporting nifty tans, though. It's a little known fact: the temperature outside in the last week of school has a direct bearing on student achievement."

"What do you expect?" said Ryan McCarthy, an RBCU junior. "We had a blizzard in April, and temps in the 10s and 20s for months. God WANTS us to be outside. And my laptop is on the fritz. Some days are worth taking the 'gentleman's C'."

Theology professor Regina Christopherson attempted to "teach the moment" by taking her students outside and discussing the essential spiritual discipline of discernment. Student Joanna Carl reported, "We had been learning that Christians discern in the midst of trials and temptations, some of which are mutable goods that may not directly lead us to our ultimate good, our God. So she took us outside on the lawn and asked us if we truly discerned that kissing our academic semester goodbye was the right decision, despite the glorious weather."

"A student then interrupted Dr. Christopherson, saying 'Professor? I think I can help discern the Holy Spirit among us.'

'You do?'

'Yeah,' he said, all blissed out. Then he pulled up a puffy dandelion head and said 'See? The Holy Spirit. Now you see it.' And he blew the seeds all over. 'Now you don't.'"

Class was cancelled until further notice (or bad weather).

--I.C.


*Really Big Catholic University

Still In Grading Mode

So this sign seemed appropriate. I assume this is next to a campus and they're offering free Mountain Dew and pizza all night.

What... not those finals?

I'll be back to writing pieces soon.

Confessional Anecdote

True story, from Fr. Lorenzo Albacete of St. Joseph's Seminary in Yonkers and frequent contributor to Godspy:

The first time I heard confession was a couple of weeks after my ordination in 1973, at St. Matthew's Cathedral in Washington, D.C., where John F. Kennedy's requiem Mass was celebrated. The penitent was a tourist who had wandered in almost by accident. ''I was on my way to a McDonald's,'' he said, ''but I saw the church and remembered Kennedy's funeral -- then I noticed the little green light in the confessional, so I came in. I'm not really sure of what I want.''

''Well,'' I replied, ''I hope you don't want a Big Mac with French fries, because if so, you have made a great mistake.''

He chuckled, then said: ''Look, Father, it's been a long, long time. I'm going to tell you things you have never heard in confession before.''

''That's not too difficult,'' I said. ''This is my first confession. Anything you say will be a shock to me.'' He started to laugh, hard. Those in line fled to the other confession line. ...

HTs to Deacon Scott, who got it from Vitus Speaks, who noted it was originally in the NY Times.

Friday's "Final Exams Period" QOTD

A Calvin and Hobbes "twofer" for final exams (which my university is enduring as we speak)....

Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
--Bill Watterson

The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog!
--Bill Watterson

Nothing Ironic About This: Happy 75th Birthday, Catholic Worker Movement

Nice article in CNS. Sic used to be a live-in volunteer for about three years at our local CW and we're both still connected to the houses and the work of hospitality:

WASHINGTON (CNS) -- Seventy-fifth anniversary or not, lunch still must be served at the New York Catholic Worker's Maryhouse. Hungry people will be waiting, as they are every day.

Jane Sammon knows the routine: hospitality, meals, conversation, responding in whatever way possible to people in need. She's been at Maryhouse for nearly 36 years, arriving in the summer of 1972 from Cleveland to live a life of voluntary poverty and personal sacrifice with a deep commitment to the works of mercy. It's a way of life many admire but few venture to try.

Maryhouse is a place where the world is made better for people "little by little," as Catholic Worker co-founder Dorothy Day often would say, recalling the example of St. Therese, the Little Flower of Jesus. It's a place where people are readily welcomed and their human dignity is uplifted. Day wanted a place where Christ would feel at home.

"It's an amazing thing that really has very little to do with us," said Sammon, 60. "It's the grace of God that keeps us going."
...
Author Jim Forest, who worked alongside Day in New York in the 1960s and 1970s and has written extensively about her life, relates a story reflecting her view about the movement's future. Asked in 1973 if she thought the movement would survive her, Day answered, "Why shouldn't it? It has already survived more than 40 years of me."

Heh. I think I would have liked Dorothy.

Vote for the "Best Worst Christian Album Cover Of All Time"!

...Over at the newly redesigned Ship O' Fools.

The home team option is at near left (click to enlarge), but I have to admit, I voted for the existentialism-run-amuck option to the far left.

"Enjoy."